Otagai – you and everyone else

It is a most troubling time in our world. Bombings in the entertainment districts in Paris. Ongoing conflict in the Middle East. Depressed economies.

Yet, the most distressing for me personally is the discord and divisive nature of conversations on refugees. At its core, it is the most basic of arguments – we should look after our own first. At that point, we have broken down the most important piece of the equation: we are looking after our own.

The human race.

So, what does this have to do with karate, you ask?

Well, nothing. And everything.

At its very core, karate is about losing the self. We train to push out our frailties: ego, hatred, anger, aggression. The list goes on. Face it, people are carbon-based beings fraught with issues and problems. But once you step on the floor, the focus should turn to improving the self. Abandoning the ego.

Karate levels the playing field.

Some people have been training longer than others. Some can kick higher. Some can punch harder. But when we line up, there is a great equalizer. It is a common phrase or command spoken almost universally in dojo.

Otagai ni rei.

For many years, the false thought I heard was that otagai was the senior position in the dojo, thus we bowed to him or her. That made no sense when I was young. It made less sense when I actually was able to understand the translation. Otagai is not a person. It is people. It is everyone – each other.  It is you (singular or plural) and me.

The response to the command is the expression onegai shimasu. The request and promise – the commitment. An exchange to help each other out. To do our best. To pay attention. To learn.

But, in my mind, it is also about the commitment to put aside our frailties and foibles, our biases and our judgment and train with each other in earnest. Let’s work together. Let’s learn something. Let’s make it out alive as friends. Friends who may leave bumps and bruises in the execution of techniques.

Not embracing the concept of otagai ni rei and making it all about you  or worse – allowing your biases and peccadilloes to rule your encounters with others in the dojo – is a cardinal sin. You have condemned yourself to making your karate simply about the physical. You have missed the martial boat.

A dojo is a community. It is, as many have said and as American karate pioneer suggested in his book the “The Karate Dojo,” a microcosm. Women. Men. Young. Old. Gay. Straight. Christian. Atheist. Jew. Muslim. Buddhist. Businessman. Mechanic. Office worker. Student. On the floor, the titles, backgrounds and labels fall. We are all here. We are all studying karate.

Otagai ni rei.

Let’s bow to each other.

There is no you vs me. There is only now. There is only this. And our expression of “onegai shimasu” is an invitation, nay an invocation: Let’s get through it together.

So, the next time you hit the floor, put some thought behind who is there. And put some feeling behind what you are actually committing to at that point.

And maybe, just maybe, look for ways to bring some of that exchange between people – all people – on the floor out in to the real world. Into our everyday lives. To people in need. To people who are hurting and suffering. To people who reach out to you in earnest – whether they are here, across the street, across the country or across the world.

And let us live the commitment of “お互い 頑張りましょう” or otagai ganbarimashou.

Translation: for each other, let’s do our best.